Hogyan törodik egy kapitalista multi cég a helyi képviseletek nyelvhasználatával! :D

From: Headquarters
To: All Hungarian Speaking Staff
Subject: Improper Language Usage

It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our
office in Hungary that offensive language is commonly used by our
Hungarian speaking staff. Such behavior, in addition to violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and staff. All personnel will immediately adhere to the following rules:

1. Words like basszameg, a kurva életbe, fasz and other such expressions will not be tolerated or used for emphasis or dramatic effect, no matter how heated a discussion may become.

2. You will not say elbaszta when someone makes a mistake, or leszarták if you see someone being reprehended, or szar when a major mistake has been made. All forms and derivations of the verb szarni and baszni are utterly inappropriate and unacceptable in our environment.

3. No project manager, section head or administrator under any circumstances will be referred to as faszfej, genya, szarházi or geci.

4. Lack of determination will not be referred to as seggfej nor will
persons who lack initiative be referred to as beszari.

5. Unusual or creative ideas offered by management are not to be referred
to as baromságok.

6. Do not say baszogassa az anyukáját if somebody is persistent; do not
add bazzzmeg, if a colleague is going through a difficult situation.
Furthermore, you must not say elbasztuk (refer to item 2) nor erre rá
fogunk baszni when a matter becomes excessively complicated.

7. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say menj a
picsába nor should you ever substitute "May I help you?" with, mi a
faszt akarsz?".

8. Under no circumstances should you ever call your elderly industrial
partners rohadt beszállítók.

9. Do not say menjenek a picsába ezzel a szarral when a relevant project
is presented to you, or should you ever answer lófasz a seggedbe when
your assistance is required.

10. You should never call partner representatives as rohadt dög or barom
állat.

11. The sexual behavior of our staff is not to be discussed in terms such
as dögös picsa, köcsög állat or buzi homokos.

12. Last but not least, after reading this note, please do not say
kitörlöm a seggem ezzel a szöveggel!

Just keep it clean and dispose of it properly.

Thank you

Üdvözlettel:
.......
Kontroller